In January 2019, I stopped eating meat. More specifically, I started a pescatarian diet, where I cut out meat but do eat fish, eggs, and dairy. At the time, I was living in Malaysia, a multicultural country mostly consisting of the Malays, Chinese, and Indians. Such diversity provided several dietary options, which made it easier for me to find places that served the food I could eat. However, after coming back to Korea, eating out became much harder for me, especially when I had to eat with people who did not know I was a pescatarian.
I could simply disclose to strangers my dietary restriction. But from what I have experienced so far, I figured it is much better to keep it to myself and close acquaintances, as I had to deal with unforeseen consequences.
When I told my grandmother that I no longer eat meat, the first thing I heard from her was that I will die by doing so. Some of my other relatives also shared similar thoughts with my grandmother, being concerned about my protein intake. To be honest, I could understand their reaction, as it is a very Korean way of showing affection – by making blunt comments. I could even see this coming beforehand when I first decided to stop eating meat.
What I could not tolerate well was comments from strangers or people who are not close to me. At my first part-time job in Korea, my boss said I was “making a fuss” for not eating meat. To make matters worse, when I first told my close friends that I decided to stop eating meat, they laughed at me so hard, thinking I was making a joke. Even though those moments were extremely inappropriate, I did not know how to handle them correctly, because I was new to those situations as well. So, I simply laughed along with them, and their words still resonate in my head today.
People who I barely know would also ask me why I became a pescatarian, which I am not complaining about. I totally understand this as it is not such a common thing in Korea. However, one thing I noticed was that I was somehow trying not to offend non-vegetarians’ feelings while explaining the reason I stopped eating meat, which made me uncomfortable telling people about my own thoughts.
Even though I am aware that Korea is not a vegetarian-friendly country, I still get frustrated every time someone comments on my choice. That is why I stopped telling people that I do not eat meat. I would rather keep it to myself than share it with everyone, especially with the ones who I will never see again.
Then, how do I order food without disclosing my dietary restriction? I usually go by making up excuses such as indigestion issues or nausea. If there is any dish I can eat, I get so excited about not having to tell people anything.
My friends who already know that I am a pescatarian always worry about me whenever we dine together at non-vegetarian-friendly places, asking if I am okay with not eating enough food. Although I appreciate their gesture, I would rather tell them not to care too much, because it was a decision I made knowing that I have to confront such discomfort. I have faced this countless times, so I am used to it, and I know how to survive.
Thanks to the changing society, vegetarianism is becoming more accepted in Korea nowadays. However, I still feel more secure when I do not have to tell people that I am a pescatarian.
You do not ask people why they eat meat. So, just do not ask too many questions to vegetarians, because they are already tired of repeating the same answers. They know what they are doing, so let them be happy without eating meat.